Communication is vital in all aspects of life, but it is particularly crucial in the world of dating. Online dating revolves around the ability to communicate effectively and is not something that all people can grasp. If you are not a natural orator or struggle to find the right words for the right occasion, our helpful guide will be a real asset to you;
The lack of body language during an online dating session can be both comforting and a hindrance. Yes, you don’t have to worry about holding wind in, for example, but on the other hand, how will you know the classic signs that they are into you or at least warming to you? You may not see them playing with their hair, undressing you with their eyes, or feel the subtle touch of their hand on your arm during a conversation, but all is not lost. Photos, emojis, dots – those are the signs you can expect to find in a chat online and train yourself to be reliant at. Activity on a flirty dating site is, therefore is based on smooth communication and subtle hints when flirting rather than physical confirmation.
Whatever you do, be genuine and not fake. It is easy to hide behind a screen and create this persona rather than be the real you. This is normally pretty easy to spot, and if it isn’t picked up straight away, then if you do ever meet, it could be a disaster. Imagine the humiliation for you and the disappointment for them when you turn out to be a completely different person from what you have portrayed online? Be yourself from the beginning to build trust and feelings with the real you, not who you want to be or think they want you to be.
Flirting online is a delicate process involving sharing interests, experiences, desires, and fantasies at the appropriate times. To discover things you have in common and can build a relationship on, you will need to be both very attentive and a good listener but also browse and pay close attention to key elements on their profile. The information disclosed on there is a window of opportunity because you know it is safe ground to talk about and explore as they have decided to share it with dating site users already. Select key things to discuss that caught your eye on their page, have fun with it and see where it goes.
If you are the kind of flirt that always ends up getting their calls directed straight to voicemail, and messages to the spam folder, then maybe it is time for a different approach. Some are fine once they get started but struggle to initiate the flirting procedure, particularly in person. It can be a lot easier online, protected by the distance between you and less embarrassed by the typed word that is no longer face-to-face like traditional dating was. Others are just clueless from start to finish and are in desperate need of assistance.
So how do you come across as playful, not creepy? Confident, not arrogant? Inquisitive, not intrusive, and above all to seem interested, not obsessed?
Always test the water before diving in. By this, we simply mean, don’t flirt too much before you know how the other person feels about it. If you go in all guns blazing and the recipient is shy or reserved, then you are likely to scare them away. Don’t fall into this trap or get carried away with your initial enthusiasm but equally, try not to be overconfident if your flirts are well received. Balance is the key to everything, as with most things in life. Flirting needs to be done in moderation to avoid overkill and to prevent anything from being misinterpreted or wrongly perceived.
One particular phenomenon to consider is negative communication, which can be the downfall of a relationship and can end a connection between two potential love birds in an instant. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that because you put a positive spin on things and are always a ‘glass is half full person’ that you cannot come across the wrong way.
Perception varies in everyone, and we will all take things we see and hear in different ways to others. You don’t have to be moaning about this, that, and the other to be in danger of boring or offending somebody. Negative communication can be perceived as no eye contact, a lack of interest or enthusiasm with your words, or something simple like mispronunciation.
You could be the happiest, bubbliest, most kind, caring, considerate person in the world. If you repeatedly say or spell (for online dating purposes) the recipient’s name incorrectly, it is going to bug them. Tolerance of this will naturally be determined by the individual concerned, but it is never a good start to date (or any continued conversation) to constantly annoy them.